.......Been a few days since I posted so.
Nothing to interesting going on around here. Not sure what to write about.
So I did something that I regret more than anything last year at this time. I'm ashamed of myself for doing it, but also understand the reasons I did it. I am a married woman and started seeing a ex of mine. My marriage was horrible, I wasn't getting physically abused but there was defiantly some mental abuse.
We worked it out and are doing better than we ever have before. But I wonder about some things. Will I ever be able to go to a wedding without thinking about being unfaithfull? Will I ever go through my birthday with out thinking about the year my husband couldn't even call me. I wonder all the time what my hubby is thinking about it.
So to top it off, as if I haven't been thinking about it enough this week, the wife of my ex calls a couple days ago and is accusing me of wishing him a happy birthday. Which was not me, and they can't figure out who it is. I'm pretty sure that hubby knows it wasn't me but it doesn't make any of this easier. Reliving all of the emotions and sitrust is horrible.
Will it ever go away, no I know that. But I hope that some of his pain is gone.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Sweat Shirt Weather
While it may not be officially not on us yet, I am feeling the effects.
We recently moved to a beautiful part of Minnesota, by the Minnesota river Vally, with a reservation near by so there are many tree's to see change. During this time of year it to me it looks like Santa clause came early and plugged in the lights on the tree's. The colors are just breath taking.
I plan to rake up a leaf pile soon and take the kids out to play in it, maybe pictures to come. (babies are sick at the moment though so hopefully after they get better0
Halloween will be here soon! One of my favorite holidays. We are dressing up the kids and taking them around my old town this year. I'm excited to watch their faces while trick or treating for the first time!
However all of this leads to the HOLIDAY SEASON. That time of year that you stress about buying gifts that you a) don't have money for b) most likely the people won't use c)meanwhile you get gifts that you have no use for. Tell me why can't we just get together and enjoy peoples company? But getting together can be a disaster to. No matter how hard I try I piss some one off every year, tell me how to balance, my own family's Christmas, both sets of in laws, and my parents Christmas's? Not to mention that they all live a minimum of 50 mill es away and gas is not cheep the last time I checked!
I shouldn't get so worked up already, back to enjoying the leaves and sweatshirt weather!
We recently moved to a beautiful part of Minnesota, by the Minnesota river Vally, with a reservation near by so there are many tree's to see change. During this time of year it to me it looks like Santa clause came early and plugged in the lights on the tree's. The colors are just breath taking.
I plan to rake up a leaf pile soon and take the kids out to play in it, maybe pictures to come. (babies are sick at the moment though so hopefully after they get better0
Halloween will be here soon! One of my favorite holidays. We are dressing up the kids and taking them around my old town this year. I'm excited to watch their faces while trick or treating for the first time!
However all of this leads to the HOLIDAY SEASON. That time of year that you stress about buying gifts that you a) don't have money for b) most likely the people won't use c)meanwhile you get gifts that you have no use for. Tell me why can't we just get together and enjoy peoples company? But getting together can be a disaster to. No matter how hard I try I piss some one off every year, tell me how to balance, my own family's Christmas, both sets of in laws, and my parents Christmas's? Not to mention that they all live a minimum of 50 mill es away and gas is not cheep the last time I checked!
I shouldn't get so worked up already, back to enjoying the leaves and sweatshirt weather!
Monday, October 6, 2008
Sleep Deprivation
Sleep Deprivation:
Waking up at 3 am only to find out that we need to go and bust up a "gathering" in our other apartment building. What are they doing at 3 am on a SUNDAY night?
~So hubs comes back at 3:25,
~infant wake up to eat, 3:55
~sick toddler wakes up,
~4-5 infant fussing,
~5:15 hubs alarm go's off!
What does sleep deprivation do to a person? Personally I'm half asleep, crabby, on edge, and just want to sleep. Meanwhile I have a lot of stuff to get done and not enough time to do it. At the moment class work is coming first, the house is a mess, the other building needs to be cleaned....ect ect ect.
The worst thing about being sleep deprived is there is nothing you can do about!
Waking up at 3 am only to find out that we need to go and bust up a "gathering" in our other apartment building. What are they doing at 3 am on a SUNDAY night?
~So hubs comes back at 3:25,
~infant wake up to eat, 3:55
~sick toddler wakes up,
~4-5 infant fussing,
~5:15 hubs alarm go's off!
What does sleep deprivation do to a person? Personally I'm half asleep, crabby, on edge, and just want to sleep. Meanwhile I have a lot of stuff to get done and not enough time to do it. At the moment class work is coming first, the house is a mess, the other building needs to be cleaned....ect ect ect.
The worst thing about being sleep deprived is there is nothing you can do about!
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