~Been gone for a while, had some major personal issues that I am sure I will be getting in to. :(
To be blunt, today sucked! Most days haven't been great but today was hard. In not so many words, end of October my husband told me he was done and there was nothing left for us to do. I never imagine my life this way, trading kids every other weekend and wishing he would say we could try again. I hate it, if we had just been who we really were insted of who we thought the other wanted us to be we wouldn't be like this now.
Babe~
I don't even know where to begin but I think in order to move on I will need to start writting. Why not here I don't picture you finding this but if you do it must be because you went looking. So here go's nothing. Everyday, well most days I wish you would say lets try again. I wanted to tell you today that why don't we get an apartment here where my parents can help me with the kids and you can be in the truck if that is what you wanted to do. Not that it wouldn't take a lot of work but I think if we both wanted to we could do it.
I don't know what you wanted from me. All I ever did was love you. I made you my everything, maybe that was the problem. But why then as soon as I ever wanted to did anything for myself did shit like this happen? I don't get it.
People tell me I'm better off, heck even you say I deserve better. Tell me why then are you all I want? Don't get me wrong I hate some of the things you do and things you don't do, but I still love you.
About Me
- MeMeMe
- I am first a MOM, the best job in the world. I am also a wife, student, daughter, sister, writer, horrible at spelling, enjoy making hand made gifts, music lover. I was lost for a while but working on finding myself again.
2 comments:
I hope everything works out in the long run. I was just looking at your blog yesterday actually, wondering why you weren't posting. It's going to be hard, but it's all about you now! And if that's the reason why he doesn't want to try again, because you started making it about you and the kids and not so much about him then maybe it is best. This situation is kinda like me and my best friend. She always tells me what she dislikes and likes about what I do, always wants to go where she wants too, but all of a sudden because I spoke up and told her I was concerned about a stupid decision she wanted to make, she turned it on me saying I was a horrible friend because she wasn't doing what I wanted HER to do. Which isn't true. I know your a strong woman, and you'll get through this all. =) Sometimes life throws you curveballs, but you just have to focus and hit em outta the park!
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